Over the course of the past year I have watched so many people turn into caricatures of cartoon villains, people I once respected repeatedly disappointed me with their hot takes on “what’s wrong with the world” and people I called friend have turned into warped piles of festering hatred. It was always there inside, hiding but it still stings when the realization that my uneasy gut feeling about them was very correct and I should have backed away a long time ago.
This is exactly why I haven’t felt like writing much anymore. Why? My words just float on the breeze, ignored and undervalued. They are labeled “exaggeration” or “dramatic” yet when they come to fruition, it’s all conveniently forgotten. You never said that! I most certainly did but, oh well, I tried to warn everyone. My job is done.
It is getting harder and harder to find
Who we are now is most definitely who we have always been. But to those who say, “people change” I say, no they don’t, they just grow into who they were always meant to be. Call it growth or evolution or whatever you like but, inherently people will people no matter the amount of calls to be more humane or empathetic or kind. If someone has to be told to be kind then logic might conclude that the kindness gene mutated or was corrupted somewhere down the line of succession and it isn’t coming back for that particular family tree. The branch is dead, withered and ready to fall to the earth in crumbled bits of its former incarnation.
At one time I wanted to believe that deep down, all people were good, every last one of them, even the awful ones. The unrelenting hope that someday they would see the light or find the true love that resided deep inside their cold little hearts has been replaced with resolute acceptance of the exact opposite. They are not evolving, improving or coming back from the persistent infection of inhumanity and I now get this. I wanted so much more for this country, this society and this world but it was not meant to be.
There will be no wringing of hands in anxiety or fear on my part concerning this absolute finding of fact that the division in our tiny part of the world is now permanent. It was meant to be, as all genetic changes dictate through mutation and natural selection. Some of us will move forward and some will not, that is by nature’s grand design. And, I am A-OK with all of that since I firmly believe that humans are only here due to nature’s whim and once we become too destructive to live, well, it’s lights out time.
We are the world
So, how do I feel knowing my type of personality; the kind, loving, empathetic and giving type is going to be demonized and slated for legislative extinction if the current pattern of “governance” remains? Calm. Steadfast. Unwavering. Joyful. I will always be me because it’s engrained in my DNA to do so, which royally pisses off the followers of the Cult of Personality. Let it, I have zero regrets or plans to change. I can’t change into that which I wasn’t designed to be remember?
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Life, as we know it, in the here and now, can be so damn annoying, tedious, infuriating and exhausting. We establish boundaries, set clear intentions and then the world’s biggest narcissists and gaslighters blow right past those carefully erected safeguards without any consideration of the harm they cause. They simply do not care and act as if anyone who dares get upset with being treated poorly is merely over-reacting or are too sensitive. The scent of gas follows them everywhere, as does the stink of purposeful manipulation.
And, why should they care? In the entitled history of many a soul-sucker’s existence throughout time, the word NO doesn’t register. Nor has it been used with great frequency to correct, castigate or call out their bad behavior. Horrible people will exploit others…you know how this story goes.
But, does it really have to GO this way? Nope. It does not…we just continue turning the cheek and ignoring the red flags because Little Johnny is just doing what his parents taught him to do, piss all over anyone different from him in a flagrant attempt at establishing dominance. Winners win! Losers get tricked, cheated, lied to or, worst yet, guilted into conceding because Little Johnny is going to get uglier until he gets his way. It’s just easier if you step aside and let him win you know?
Spoiled to their rotten core.
But, you can’t say that to Johnny’s face or his pampering parents will carry on, in like manner, threatening legal action, shouting about how they are being discriminated against or oppressed. We know they aren’t and they know they aren’t but projection and deflection are powerful tools for liars and cheats.
Now, before we go too far, yes, I am white and yes, I am talking about the atrocious behavior of other white people. No metaphors here. I can only speak to that which I personally know and I know how terrible white people can act when they see a win on the horizon but there are minority obstacles in the way. It may sound harsh to word it that way but how else can I describe what I see? The willful trampling of others to get to the top of the heap while crowing about the need for those less entitled to pull themselves up. “I did it! Why can’t they?” Yeah, why can’t they Johnny? Is it because you are still standing on their necks?
HOW DARE YOU DRAW ATTENTION TO OUR EVIL SKELETONS!!!
I do dare because it is important. I am fucking tired of tone deaf, willfully ignorant people who say insensitive things as an afterthought because if they didn’t experience it then they don’t believe the lived experiences of others not like them. To live in such a pristine bubble! But, is it really? No, it’s messy and full of contradictions that scream hypocrisy while those of the same ilk look the other way. Not me! I’m superior!
Jesus Christ, what a bunch of losers.
Hell, even Jesus, if he actually existed, wouldn’t like the loud and obnoxious crew that marches around claiming to be his righteous disciples. Okay, now that cat is way out of the bag so I suppose I should address the fact that I don’t prescribe to any religious book club so before anyone comments that they will pray for me just save it. I don’t believe what you believe and therefore your rules of deluded engagement don’t apply to me. That IS how it works you know? Your beliefs are yours and my beliefs are mine and that’s perfectly fine. Relax. You have your ticket to heaven all set right? So why do you care what I do?
*I wrote the above collection of words prior to the 2024 presidential election and am just now looking through my drafts folder. So apropos!
Now, back to little Johnny. Apparently, half of America is full of entitled, asshole Johnny’s who don’t give a shit about anyone else but themselves, their fragile egos and, apparently a few cents off on gas. Offer them a coupon for 50 cents off a hamburger and they would vote for satan himself over protecting women’s rights, LGBTQIA+ rights, or any other rights marginalized groups deserve. Get that? They value money above all else and even the dirt poor ones think they will be rewarded monetarily by Donald “The Shart of the Deal” Trump. Nah, he hates the poor, even the ones that fawn all over him and send in their last Social Security dime in exchange for a cheap-ass, ugly red hat made in China.
“It’s the red hat that replaced the white hood”
Awww, now that’s not fair! Not all of his cult followers are racists!! Hmmm, to align one’s self with darkness is to condone the darkness and by DARKNESS I mean hateful racism, xenophobia, homophobia, sexism, ableism, fascism, anti-semitism, authoritarianism, all the bad isms. He is that and more all rolled up in a bloated orange bag of flatulent gas. Own him and his “concepts of a plan”, he’s your albatross now.
I know, I know, the hackles are raising on the back of the necks of the MAGA faithful. Salty tears are welling up in those blinded eyes, darkened to reason, kindness, empathy, dare I say, love even? How can these good “Christians” who claim to love Jesus so much resort to covering up lies and looking the other way each time their manly Genghis Don sins openly while dancing like he’s jerking two dicks to an iconic gay anthem like YMCA? Does he realize? Do his followers get it? Probably not, he’s their Orange Jesus and can do no wrong.
Catastrophic meteor! Kill us all now!!!!
I really don’t know where I was originally going with this when I first started writing it months ago. Maybe I was planning to discuss how I wished people were kinder, more thoughtful, less brainwashed, less gaslighty. “I know you are but what am I?” It’s SO tiring and I think I’m done wishing for the impossible. Chalk it up to long COVID brain, lead poisoning for the older folk, mental illness, fetal alcohol syndrome, I don’t know. What I DO know is that I am done debating, pleading, educating and hoping they will change. They are gone and I, and every other wise person I know are moving on.
It is time to move through life as if these lost souls are nothing more than sad ghosts, because they are absolutely not living in this reality anymore. They are on the brain eating worm, decapitate a whale, dump a dead baby bear in Central Park and laugh about it train with RFK Jr. It looks pretty crazy when it’s written out like that doesn’t it??? And believe me, if I hadn’t seen the interviews and podcasts Robert F. Wackado did confessing the depravity above I would say it was nuts too.
These are MAGA’s best and brightest. And, ya’ll gave that shit the stamp of approval when you voted for him. Can’t pick and choose, Trump and his band of miscreants are a package deal and you can’t have one without the whole insane bunch of rotten bananas. You will be known both by the company you keep and by the behavior you silently condone. You may have not committed the acts but each time an excuse is offered or an offense is brushed off it becomes a mark on your character, your integrity, your honor and, ultimately, your soul.
It has been disappointing and frightening to watch so many people become lost to the virus that is MAGA but now that I understand there is no rehabilitation, I can breathe. I am not afraid and am at peace with everything and anything that is about to happen. We get what we get and we don’t complain but I also know that the main lesson I have learned from all of this is that MAGAism has broken the spell of wanting to help everyone in need for many people in America. I will help MAM only moving forward. Me. And. Mine. It’s the consequence that naturally occurs when people continually show you exactly who they, that they will never change, and that they don’t care about you.
Congratulations MAGA! My most fervent wish is that you all get everything you voted for. It was what you wanted after all and I accept that. I’m happy for you. There will be no “I told you so” admonishments because everything that went down happened because you felt it was the right thing to do. No regrets! No looking back. No asking if we can still be around one another, if we can put differences aside. That can’t happen anymore because it would fly in the face of everything you proclaimed you stood for. MAGA good, Democrats evil. Don’t jeopardize your souls, I would never ask you to!
So, bask in your victory because you earned it and kudos on all the winning.
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to “In the Land of Reverie” and L.A. Cobb (formerly L.A. Askew) with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
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