All Bark and No Bite: Online Rants, Lies and the Spreaders of Misinformation

“How dare you say that!”

“You have your FACTS all wrong!”

RANT! RANT! RANT!!!

“I’m offended by you being offended!”

“Are you calling me a liberal, conservative, Christian, Muslim, atheist, sexist, racist, homophobe and ON and ON?”

Can we all collectively work together to make this shit stop? Please? I have literally hit my limit with the massive amount of utter bullshit I see posted on social media as FACT when it isn’t fact at all and the sources listed are suspect and quite likely faked on purpose. Gotta rally the base! Throw them some putrid meat to stoke the fire of inner discontent they all seem to have because after all, psychological manipulation works best on those easy to anger. Right?

WHAT IS A RELIABLE SOURCE? CHECK YOUR SOURCES HERE!

The truth isn’t outrageous enough I suppose so, now in the land of fake everything why not fake outrage, fake hurt feelings, fake intelligence, fake sources, fake news, fake approval ratings and fake crisis situations just to stimulate traffic flow to certain websites that produce propaganda filled articles and memes with the sole purpose of being shared over and over until they are believed. Life isn’t a goddamned reality show with ratings to boost…it’s actually REAL!

“He posted it on Twitter so I know it’s true!! I always go straight to the source for my information!”

No. It wasn’t true. It was PROPAGANDA! You got HAD sucker.

How liars create the ‘illusion of truth’

And, you cannot seem to sway these lie gobbling cult-like followers of fallacy because they desperately want to be right. “Oh, sweet baby Jesus let me be right and let these nasty traitor liberals be wrong,” and….second verse reverse from the first! Sing along! What if we are ALL wrong? What then?

Apparently we are supposed to hate one another now and if you aren’t batting for Team MAGA then you are raucously called everything but a child of God while the Other Side throws down the DEPLORABLE and IGNORANT gauntlet with great glee. In God We Trust needs to be removed from our new God…the almighty dollar and replaced with Passive- Aggression Or Bust!


We are a bunch of sad little keyboard warriors that only gather the courage to blast those we view as divisive and resistant in 280 character spurts loaded with grammatical errors and the blatant overuse of exclamation marks!!!!!!!! This is never done face-to-face because that’s too aggressive and personally exposing! Bark, bark, bark…type, type, type…rant.

Fuck off!

You are either ONE OF US or you are against America. Oh, and the flag, can’t forget the poor battered flag that has now been given the status of Saint Betsy Ross. It’s okay to wear this vestige of ultimate allegiance in the form of a bandana, shorty shorts, tank top or banana hammock but LORD, don’t you dare fail to stand at attention to it! Where are our manners?

Oh, how far we have fallen…I weep for the future of this country. I SERIOUSLY worry about the deliberate dumbing down of our populous. Give it a rest okay? It’s getting fucking tiresome and annoying. And, when I’m annoyed I just tune that shit out and offenders lose ALL CREDIBILITY. You are now a joke to me and I shall treat you as such.

Do you even know what you are ranting about? Does it make sense? Is it reality based or “alternative fact” based? Have you been manipulated into believing propaganda? It’s important to check your reality before shitting on others for their opposing views. AND, making fun of those in power is NOT treason you simpletons. It may be disrespectful and childish but, it’s FREE SPEECH and a protected form of protest. And…I can handle the “consequences” or social media blowback. I need to patent a lotion for all the thin-skinned out there!

The First Amendment reads as follows: “Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the government for a redress of grievances.”

I AM TREMENDOUSLY AGGRIEVED!

The thin-skinned president who made it illegal to criticize his office

Sorry about your guaranteed public education, public transportation, fire departments, police departments, public libraries, every branch of the US military, public roads & highways, Social Security, Medicare/Medicaid, public, not private prisons & jails, public hospitals, Veterans Affairs Administration, public universities, public parks, public toilets, public drinking fountains, public parking and public everything that easily classifies as a form of SOCIALISM. You know that right?

And yet, you most likely have utilized many of these during your lifetime, as have your parents, grandparents or even great grandparents. Now, tell me again how you are right and I am wrong?

If the above list of “social” services our government provides to citizens is egregious to you then I guess you will have to opt out of ALL of them in order to stay a pure, non-socialist American. It’s only fair after all.

Carry on soldier. Enjoy!

© 2019 L.A. Askew

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to “In the Land of Reverie” with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Where differences matter the most

Don’t you just love the meme parade on social media following all tragic events of late? And by “of late” I mean every damn day!

I can’t wake up to good news lately because, well, it’s all awful 24/7 in Orange Tweet Land but it’s the, “let’s be fair” or “let’s love everyone even though they don’t share your political beliefs” bullshit that fans my fire of dislike for humankind the most.

Y’all just don’t get it!

Or, maybe you do and you just don’t care. I’m thinking it’s this one because caring takes effort and, WOMP-WOMP it’s becoming more and more apparent that “say it like it is” is really code for SHOW US HOW MUCH OF AN ASSHOLE YOU REALLY ARE! It’s okay, really, the Orange Anus in the White House will praise and excuse you and then pardon you if need be. That still doesn’t take away any of the stink…just so we are clear.

*Click the Womping link above and just read the vile comments from American citizens that feel pretty righteous typing away on their computer keyboards and phones in their non-cage homes.

Come on out you constitutional experts! You barkers of propaganda designed to do the very thing your memes and psshh comments are trying to wave off: Separate us even further. Do you really not see this? To condescendingly say: “I don’t hate people who don’t believe the same way I do” while posting obvious untruths and purposely incendiary links to articles, videos, and memes that drip of every ism around is gas lit Hamburger Helper. It’s not even the foie gras of propaganda. It’s the cheapest form of party line gruel.

It literally makes me both cry and laugh to see how well psychological warfare has worked on the very people whom I have heard say, “I don’t believe in that psychobabble, mumbo-jumbo!” Yeah, you may not BELIEVE in it but it still exists and its effectiveness has never been more evident than now based on how many families and friendships social media has torn apart since the Age of Orange began.

*I use derogatory nicknames for Tiny Hands 45 because:

#1) He set the example so if it’s good enough for him then it’s doubly good enough for regular folk! And,

#2) I fear saying his name 3 times in a row, like Beetlejuice, because, well, we know how that went and I don’t like sandworms or zombies.

Anyway, getting back to the topic at hand; in short, some differences really do matter. Like the difference between people who are and aren’t horrified with government sanctioned child abuse. I get it, shit has been going down for a long time and very little was done BUT, we are in the HERE AND NOW. It is in our fucking faces non-stop and the fucking tweets keep coming and the fucking asshole talking heads, oh sorry…apologists, well really, justifiers for the shitty behavior of a goddamn sitting US president all find great glee in this situation.

Hear that? THEY APPEAR TO BE OKAY WITH THIS SHIT!!!!!!!

Gotta secure the border. Gotta take back American jobs. Gotta, gotta, gotta….uh, how about gotta stop abusing children, period.

We all know the government doesn’t give a shit about the abuse of American children or THAT would have been taken care of long ago but to now turn that stern hand on children from Mexico, El Salvador, Honduras, you know, the countries Grand Poobah Cheeto deemed “shithole countries” is pretty telling. For a country with a massive Orange Talking Head that touts how great he is, THIS ain’t so great.

And Y’all wonder why people hate us? Really? You wonder?

My point here is this; don’t tell me to respect your beliefs if one of them includes justifying the abuse of children. On that, we will remain very fucking different. On that, we will remain in constant disagreement and on THAT we will remain extremely distant. Count on it.

 

© 2018 L.A. Askew
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to “In the Land of Reverie” with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
To steal the creative work of another to use as your own is the grand height of laziness.

Lying Tree…

I do not have a conventional family tree. I have a lying tree.

For as long as I can remember the “facts” behind who my blood relatives really are have been blurred and carefully edited to fit a narrow narrative of acceptability. What will the neighbors think? What will random strangers on the street think? And, finally, what will the people at our church think? That last one always created pause for me since church implies certain moral values and the very act of lying to cover personal embarrassment from fellow churchgoers is ironic and laughably hypocritical.

But, don’t say this to the patriarch and matriarch of this fabricated fable!

In modern times there is this little thing called the internet. On this construct exists a massive online newspaper archive called Newspapers.com ( and I am sure there are many more) where anyone willing to pony up a few bucks a month can search the names of relatives, friends, ex-friends, and ex-lovers to see if they ever “made the news” from the 1700’s to the 2000’s.

On this website, I found out that my paternal grandfather was charged with and eventually found guilty of misappropriation of funds while a Justice of the Peace for Cook County, Illinois in the 1960’s.  He was sentenced to 6 months in county jail and not once, in all the years I have known my mother or father have either said one word about this.  Not surprising really since my mother said once, in church, that my older brother was “away at college” when he was actually in jail.  Being a scofflaw runs in the family you see but, Que sera sera, there is not one thing that can be done about it now. The fibbing branches just keep falling…

IMG_7660

Several years ago, after a few glasses of wine around my younger sister’s kitchen table, my older sister mentioned a conversation she had with our mother that included the words, “That was the time when your grandfather was away in jail.” Wait! What?  “Oh, didn’t I tell you that?” was my mother’s response to my sister’s shocked surprise. No, you sure as hell did not!  Much like the various health conditions relatives had that were not shared with us or the fact that she had been borrowing on life insurance policies our maternal grandmother purchased for us for years without our knowledge. I’m sure there is more but will stop at the tip of the ice burg for now. What they don’t know won’t hurt them right?

THIS is the kind of thing I am talking about here. This is also the kind of thing that the truth-impaired bemoan as  “ancient history” and “what’s in the past is the past” but my argument is that this very shit stabs right at the heart of what is wrong with my family and many others. Lying just for the sake of lying, lying for personal financial gain and finally, lying to save face. Once you have protected your image to the point of alienating and potentially physically harming family it becomes clear what is more important to some people:

Not us. Not me. Not my daughter. Not my partner. Everyone is fair game for an attack apparently. I have the letters, emails, Facebook posts and text messages to prove it.

My family is a sad stomach churning potluck of avoidance, delusion, resentment, and selfishness. And, I too have experienced and participated in all of these things over the years and will make that clear. In order to write this I have to be honest and in order to write this, I also have to shore myself up for any pending attacks on my recollection and character. I have been attacked on both fronts by both my mother and my younger sister so any further vitriol is easy to shrug off. They will do what they do and have always done and I will do the opposite because to do anything else is a sure recipe for self-harm and I’m too old for this shit!

As you, dear reader, peruse this little essay I am sure that there are other eyes scanning as well. Eyes that are looking for any mention of them, any mention of blame, any mention at all. Hello! Despite our falling out, I am glad you are here and I am even gladder that you might be reading my words. Take them in. Mull them over for a bit before responding and, might I add, before firing off in a flash of keyboard courage consider picking up the phone to address any grievances with me personally. I will take your call and I will listen to what you have to say. I may hang up without saying more than an initial “hello” but I will listen none the less.

So, for the foreseeable future, I will be HONEST. Everything I write about will involve confession, confrontation and, finally the search for redemption. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t need to be redeemed in my family’s eyes but in my own. I am looking for peace, nothing more and nothing less.

Stick with me on this journey okay? I might need a cheering section when the wolves arrive…

© 2018 L.A. Askew
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to “In the Land of Reverie” with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.